


I'm Yours

by Ms_C_Marie



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, Grief/Mourning, Healing, Love, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-09
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-07-22 13:55:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7441798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ms_C_Marie/pseuds/Ms_C_Marie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One Shot: Alternative ending to 2x23<br/>Barry makes a different decision after the kiss on the porch and Barry and Iris figure out how to go from being best friends to a being a couple.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Yours

**Author's Note:**

> This is the longest thing I've ever written just for fun. I hope you enjoy it!! It consumed me the last couple of weeks.
> 
> ***I'm West Allen Hugs on Tumblr***

  
The sweetest words passed through her lips. "I love you, Barry." They surprised him, these words he so longed to hear in her soft, sweet voice. Although his head and heart were filled with unbelievable despair, he felt the warmth of her love, a sliver of light against the stark darkness. He leaned in slowly to softly press his lips against hers; a promise that he loved her too and always would. His eyes followed her into the house and watched her surrounded by the love of their family and friends. He knew what he wanted to do and it was so hard to resist the urge. He also knew what he had to do. And so in that moment, he took off running down the street. He ran from the loves of his life, tears filling his eyes, the wind beating harshly against his face. Barry ran. Fast. But he didn't let himself run too fast; not fast enough to get to the place he desperately wanted to go. It hurt his heart not to run that fast, but moments later he was where he felt he should be - at Henry's cabin in the woods.  
  
He slept for three days. Not all day or all through the night, but in 3 to 4-hour naps here and there. Sometimes he dreamed that his mom and dad were still alive. And then he'd awaken to reality and would literally punch the pillow, angry at the realization. No one ever tells you it will feel like this, losing those closest to you. He had just come to terms with not saving his mother last year. Then watching his father killed felt like the fresh scab had been ripped away, exposing the raw, fleshy wound to a salt rub. It hurt in the worst way. The second death made him mourn the first one all over again. He was so consumed by grief that he didn't bother to shower and he hardly ate. When he did notice his hunger, he'd run to the nearby town for sandwiches or pizzas. At night he’d lie in the hammock in the backyard staring at the stars thinking of her words: “Wherever you need to go, whatever you need to do, do it. When you get back, I’ll be here.” This, he needed to do this, so that he could get back to her, whole. “I love you, Iris,” he would whisper into the still dark night and imagine his words drifting on the gentle breeze to her.  
  
A week later Barry was standing in the living room with two stacks of boxes neatly lined up against the wall. He didn’t know when he started packing up Henry’s things, not that there was much to pack. He remembered the day he came across a manila envelope with old photos; pictures of his parents before he was born and many more taken when he was little. There were a few pictures he was sure he’d never seen before. Looking at them filled him with joy… and sadness. Barry began sorting through all of Henry’s things, many items igniting old memories long forgotten; a trip to the mall to buy a father’s day present, a Saturday spent in his dad’s office at the hospital. Then he found an old leather backpack, he assumed from his father’s college days. Inside was a stack of letters bound by a rubber band, letters to his dad from his mom.   
  
He pulled one of the smooth sheets from its envelop and his eyes traveled along the curly script. He was intrigued by this peek into his parents’ inner world. He read each one, smiling at times, brushing away tears at others. What Barry could make out from reading one side of their exchange was that when his dad was in the beginning of his residency program, he had bouts of self-doubt. Living in another city, the incredibly long hours and the sleep deprivation took a toll. On more than one occasion his dad had contemplated dropping out of the program. His mom was unwavering in her belief in his dad, constantly encouraging him, giving him hope. Barry noticed that one of the letters was crumpled and he imagined that his dad used to carry that letter tucked in a pocket as a reminder of her love as he went about his day.  
  
The letters gave Barry a nuanced understanding of who his parents were besides being his mom and dad. But what struck Barry the most was how much his mother’s words to his dad echoed Iris’ words to him. When his dad thought about quitting his residency, his mother had written, “You’ve got this. You’re strong.” This was so similar to Iris telling him, “I know you can do this. I know how strong you are,” when he fought Grodd. And when his father worried about taking an extra year for specialty training, an extra year away from her, his mom wrote, “Do whatever you need to do. I’m not going anywhere.” In that moment Barry truly appreciated that he and his father were very blessed to find unconditional love and support from the women they loved. And for the first time, instead of dwelling on how much that had been taken from him, he imagined his parents reunited again after so many years and this thinking brought him some peace.

  
  
***

  
  
Iris doesn’t even look up when an intern plops a pile of mail and proofs in her inbox. As she rummages through the stack searching for items that need immediate attention, she sees a postcard flutter to the floor. She leans down to pick up a picture of a charming  small town's main street. The reverse had Barry's neat handwriting: "I miss you." Iris smiled.  It had been two weeks since he had gone up north. They all knew he was alright. He had arranged with Capt. Singh to take a few weeks off from work. It was hard for Iris to keep her distance, to not call him or text or drive up there to be with him. But she knew she had to give him his space. One of the things that Grandma Esther always told her when she spent summers down south was that sometimes a man needed to go into his cave, alone, to figure things out; to follow him would only push him further away. So Iris did all that should could not to take his leaving personally. She was working on a big assignment and that kept her pretty busy.  
  
Two days later, when she returned from lunch, Iris stopped short when she noticed the thick cream colored envelop sitting alone in her grey inbox tray. She slowly picked up the fat envelop and slid her fingers over the smooth paper. She was torn. She was happy to hear from Barry again, but he’d never written her a letter before. Why didn’t he just call?  Or text? She had a queasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. What if he changed his mind? What if he really didn’t want to give them a shot and this was a letter explaining why? Iris pushed the thought away, tucked the letter into her purse and got back to work.  
  
It was after eight when she finally left CCPN that evening. She was supposed to head over to her dad’s to have dinner with him and Wally, but she felt herself walking in the opposite direction of her car, walking and walking, until she found herself on the rooftop. Her spot. Their spot. Iris pulled the letter from her purse and paused before she allowed her finger to slide in between the flaps to undo the seal. She removed the sheets of folded paper, took a deep breath and read.  
  
On those pages Barry came to life as if he were standing right in front of her. He was so unabashedly open in sharing how hopeless he felt when he left and that the only way to feel whole again was to go through the darkness instead of running from it. He talked about the knot in his stomach unraveling, and slowly, but surely, letting go of the pain. He talked about going through his father’s belongings and donating much of them to a thrift shop in the nearby town. He talked about finding and reading his mom’s letters. He also talked about looking up at the stars at night and thinking about her. Then asked her if she could take a few days off from work and come up to the cabin to be with him. Iris was touched and giddy like a school girl. The next day she wrote back saying that she was working on a big story, but she would see him at the end of the following week. Three more letters arrived before she left for the cabin. However, Iris had a sneaking suspicion that these didn’t come through the mail. They were incredible sweet. Barry did have a way with words and now Iris had her very own stack of love letters.  
  
The drive up to the cabin was scenic…and pretty much deserted. There was almost no traffic in either direction. Having gotten turned around twice, Iris hoped that she’d make it to the cabin before dusk. Cell service was really bad in the area and she couldn’t get a signal. Seeing the sky begin to dim, she wished she had left earlier. Iris had stayed at the office longer than she had planned, working on the final edit of her big story. Then when she got home she ended up changing her outfit a few times. She kept asking herself, “What do you wear on a first date with your best friend in a cabin in the woods? And was this even a date?”  Barry had said he would make dinner.  
  
She pulled up to the cabin just as the sky was starting to turn orange behind the mountains. She grabbed her travel bag, purse and laptop bag from the back seat. She had just slammed her door shut and turned toward the cabin when she saw him standing in the doorway, a big grin on his face. Iris didn’t remember dropping her bags or if she had the chance to take a step before he dashed towards her and swallowed her in a big hug. All she knew was that it felt so good to be in his arms. He was squeezing her tight and her feet barely touched the ground. He put her down and kissed her softly on the lips and they both grinned at the realization that a kiss was a part of their greeting now.  
  
Barry bent down to pick up her bags. "You had exactly five more minutes to get here before I came looking for you.” He sounded a little worried still.  
  
“I think I took a couple of wrong turns. And I couldn’t get a signal.”  
  
"Cell service is really bad up here," Barry explained. "It's practically non-existent is the cabin. But, I’ve had a little success at getting a signal over there…” He pointed to the large tree in front of the cabin. Iris gave him a questioning look and he shrugged his shoulders in reply.  
  
“I’ll take you into town if you need to connect for work. The connection is much better there. Come inside.”  
  
The inside of the cabin was cozy - and neat and clean which surprised Iris because Barry had the habit of peeling off layers of clothing and dropping them wherever he was standing at the time. On the drive up she had mentally prepared herself for the cabin being a disaster area resulting from his living alone in the woods for almost a month. She was pleasantly surprised by the orderly contrast.   
  
"Let me give you a little tour," he said.  
  
He showed her around the intimate cabin with an open floor plan. The largest space consisted of the living area and dining area which was flanked by the kitchen. On the other side of the room were two bedrooms and the bathroom.   
  
"I set you up in here..."  
  
He led the way to the bedroom closest to the bathroom.  
  
"I think this room was supposed to be mine...or at least the guest room."   
  
Iris saw his eyes dim slightly and she rubbed his arm.  
  
"For some odd reason this room is cooler than the other one, so you should be more comfortable here. There’s no AC, but it does get much cooler at night."   
  
He set her bags down on a chair in the corner.  
  
"Dinner's in 15 minutes." And with that he turned and left, closing the door behind him.  
  
Iris' eyes traveled around the room, taking in the green summer quilt on the bed, the extra pillows, her favorite scented candle on the dresser and the small arrangement of wild flowers on the night stand. Barry had thought of everything. The room looked like a quaint bed and breakfast. She frowned though when she remembered the kitchen. How could dinner be in 15 minutes when there seemed to be nothing going on in there? It was virtually spotless. Then she remembered his speed and imagined him whizzing around at this very moment making dinner. She sat on the edge of the bed and heard a slight creak from her weight.   
  
"Interesting..." she said aloud, a mischievous smile crossing her face. She didn't know if things would progress that far this weekend, especially with Barry sleeping in Henry's old room and she in here, but just thinking about it made her feel a little heated.  
  
Iris unpacked a few things, hung up a couple of dresses and went to the bathroom to freshen up. On the way back to the bedroom she again noticed no kitchen activity. She re-applied her lipstick and then went to find Barry. Not seeing him in the front yard, she decided he must be out back. She crossed the room to the kitchen, slid the patio door aside and stepped into the backyard. And the sight took her breath away. She stood there, with her hands covering her mouth, taking it all in.   
  
There were twinkle lights wrapped around the trunks and branches of all the trees giving the backyard a romantic glow. From the patio steps, a trail of miniature lanterns dotted a path to a small round table and two chairs draped in white linen. The table was set for two complete with candle light and wine. Barry was a few feet away at the barbecue grill flipping the steaks. The potatoes and grilled vegetables were already on the table. He looked up and smiled when he saw her.  
  
"I hope you're hungry," he said. He met her half way on the illuminated path and escorted her to the table, pulled out her chair, and poured the wine.  
  
"This is amazing, Barr! It’s so beautiful! I can’t believe you did all this!”  
  
"For you…” was his simple reply.   
  
He returned to the grill and flipped the steaks once more before plating them and returning to the table.  
  
"I haven't seen you cook in a very long time."  
  
"Well, I did get a lot of practice these last couple of weeks." He sat down across from her. "I found some of my mom’s recipes in an old box."  
  
"You did? Did you find the one for mac and cheese?"  
  
He nodded. "I did."  
"We're gonna have to try it out then. I know our version is really close, but we can finally make the real thing!"    
  
Barry smiled, a really warm smile, but he shook his head “no.”  
  
“I’m happy with our version," he said. He raised his glass. “Cheers!”  
  
“Chees!” she replied, clinking her glass with his.  
  
As they cut into their steaks, Barry thought about how their version of the recipe came to be. When Barry first came to live with Joe and Iris he barely ate. Joe attempted to get him to eat by making macaroni and cheese, one of his absolute favorite dishes. But Joe was a busy man and his mac and cheese came straight out of the box. It was nowhere near his mom's rich, cheesy, satisfying goodness.   
  
The week of his twelfth birthday, Barry came home from soccer practice to the familiar aroma and for a split second he almost expected to see his mom in the kitchen. He walked into the kitchen and Iris shouted "Happy early birthday, Barr!" with a huge grin on her face and a pan of baked macaroni and cheese that looked just like his mom's.  
  
Barry still remembered how he helped himself to seconds and thirds; how it was so close to his mom's recipe, probably 90% there. And Iris had made it for him. She was very evasive about how she figured out the recipe. She claimed she found a recipe in a magazine. He didn’t really buy that story, but he didn’t press her for more information. He was just glad to have one of the comforts of his old home in his new home. Barry and Iris made mac & cheese together a few times a month thereafter. Not long after that birthday, Henry allowed him to visit him regularly at Iron Heights and that’s when he learned that Iris had gone to see Henry to get the recipe. She didn’t even tell Joe. She had Mrs. Gibson, the neighbor that sometimes looked in on them after school, take her. Henry told Barry how Iris had sat in front of him asking very specific questions and jotting down notes so that she could re-create Nora's mac and cheese. Henry didn’t know all the ingredients, but he knew that the most important thing was that her recipe called for three different cheeses. Because of all the trouble Iris went through back then, Barry wasn’t interested in going backwards. Iris’ version was home to him now.  
  
"So tell me about this big story you’ve been working on.”  
  
Iris’ face lit up. “Well, it all started when I was working on a piece about the rise in student loan debt. I interviewed several students at Hudson and many of them kept saying the same thing: they were encouraged to take out loans that exceeded their tuition, fees and living expenses. In some cases, the loans far exceeded what was needed. They were told that they could help their families or buy whatever they wanted with the extra money. But, the kicker was that they were being steered towards private loans with higher interest rates instead of federal loans.”  
  
“Really?” Barry asked, intrigued.  
  
“Yeah, so I started digging a little deeper and things really started to unravel. There is, well was, a small group of financial aid advisors in cahoots with CC National Bank. They were getting kickbacks for steering kids to these private loans and the bank was approving loans for way more than was necessary or affordable. Can you believe it?”  
  
“Man, that sucks. Just think, that could’ve been us not too long ago or Wally now.”  
  
“Yeah, I know. A lot of the kids affected are first generation college kids too."  
  
Barry shook his head. "So when does your article come out?”  
  
“Monday. Lead story.”  
  
Barry grinned.  “Awesome! I can’t wait to read it!”  
  
Iris’ cheeks were starting to hurt from all the smiling she did. They spent the rest of the night talking and talking; taking advantage of the fact that they wouldn't be interrupted by anyone or anything. There was nothing left unsaid between them. They took a long stroll around the property and retuned to lie in the hammock, snuggled side by side. Iris laid her head on Barry's chest and they were lulled by the hammock's gentle sway as the twinkle lights sparkled under a cloud-covered sky.  
  
Iris rolled over in her sleep and the rays of sunlight in her eyes woke her. It took her a moment to figure out where she was. She heard the low creak of the bed as she sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. Fatigue from a tough week and having a little too much wine must have knocked her out because she didn’t remember getting into bed. She was still fully clothed. Her boots were neatly placed on the floor at the foot of the bed. She found her cell on the night stand. It was 11:22 am. Wow! She hadn’t slept this late in ages; college was probably the last time. She headed towards the bathroom and noticed Barry on the couch, tucked in and pretty much dead to the world. She resisted the urge to run her finger through his hair or trace his eyebrows. She didn’t dare wake him. He looked so peaceful. He had told her about not being able to sleep more than 3 or 4 hours at night, so she wanted him to have some rest.  
  
Iris showered, got dressed in jeans shorts and a white tank top, put her hair up in a high ponytail and then went to see what she could scrounge up to eat. In the fridge she found all the ingredients for her special western omelets and took the hint. She was looking around for a frying pan when she heard Barry stir.  
  
“Hey, sleepy head. Are you hungry?” she called to him.  
  
Barry yarned, eyes still closed. "What time is it?"  
  
“A little after noon,” Iris replied.  
  
His eyes flew open and he turned to her. "Really? Why didn’t you wake me?”  
  
“You looked so peaceful, Barr. Besides, I didn’t know if you’d been awake all night.”  
  
Barry sat up and rubbed his eyes, still groggy.  
  
“Were you able to sleep at all last night?” she asked softly.  
  
“Yeah, last thing I remember was carrying you to bed. You were out!" He laughed. "It was too hot in there." He pointed to Henry's room. "So I came back out here. That was around two."  
  
"And you slept all the way through?"  
  
Barry looked a little bewildered, and then smiled. "Yeah, I guess so." She could see him mentally count the hours. "Must be because you're here." He winked at her, got up and headed to the bathroom.   
  
"Do you want an omelet?" she called after him.  
  
"Sure do!"  
  
While Barry took a shower, Iris made some coffee, chopped the ham, onions and peppers and whipped the eggs. She was lost in thought, feeling glad that her presence in some way brought Barry some peace. She has just poured the egg mixture into the pan when she felt his hands wrap around her waist and his lips grace the side of her neck.  
  
"...smell good." A barely audible whisper. He nuzzled her neck and Iris felt her stomach flutter. She wasn't expecting this. He had only kissed her hello last night.  
  
She giggled. She couldn't help herself. "It'll be ready in a couple of minutes." She was trying hard to concentrate, to not let the eggs burn.  
  
"I meant you. You always smell so good."   
  
His lips made a path down to her shoulder and she could feel the roughness of his scruff. He had not shaved. He squeezed her tight and kissed the top of her head before moving away. She missed him immediately. His body was so warm behind hers. She regretted not stopping him. That was one of her favorite things, him hugging her from behind. She'd have to figure out a way to tell him.   
  
Barry poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen island.   
  
"We're a little behind schedule, but I thought we'd go for a hike. There's something I want to show you."   
  
"There's a schedule?" She asked him with a raised eyebrow as she placed an omelet before him and turned back to the stove to start another.  
  
"Absolutely!"   
  
"And what's after hiking?"   
  
"There's a really good flea market in town. I checked it out last weekend. Good vintage stuff, good artisans. Then a picnic in the park. We need to get there early though to grab good seats for Moonlight Movies."  
"Those are older movies, right? What movie are they playing tonight?"  
  
"The Dark Night."  
  
"What?! I love that movie!" Iris gushed.   
  
Barry nodded, pleased with himself, as if he had personally picked the movie.  
  
"And there's a DJ after the movie," he added.  
  
"A DJ? So are you saying there might be dancing on that schedule of yours? with me? in public?"  
  
Barry just shrugged. "Anything's possible." He knew Iris loved to dance and he'd be happy just to sit and watch her. But, he also knew she'd want him to dance with her even if it was just one song.   
  
Iris sat down with her omelet. "I like what I'm hearing, Barr."

  
  
***

  
  
So the hike really was a hike, not the romantic stroll along tree-lined paths that Iris had envisioned. There was some climbing involved along a pretty rough terrain. Barry led the way and would reach back and grab her hand when the rocks were slippery.  
  
However, the hike was like a gift Iris never knew she wanted. She got to experience in real time how strong and solid Barry was. He was lean, but mostly muscle and since he didn't use his speed she had the time to admire his strong arms, broad shoulders, long legs and tight ass. He carried her piggyback through a particularly wet and rocky path. She inhaled his scent as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She pressed herself to his back as he held her firmly under her thighs. It was a hot day, and he broke a sweat and Barry had never been sexier.   
  
"We're here," he announced.   
  
Iris heard the sound of rushing water just past the bushes in front of them. They reached the clearing and she looked up to see a waterfall cascading down the side of the mountain and flowing into a rocky pool of water at their feet. It was a thing beauty; like something you'd see in a movie or on a travel website. Iris swung the small backpack off her shoulders, pulled out two bottles of water and handed one to Barry. She then hunted for her phone to snap a few pics of the scenery, but when she looked up from her crouched position it was Barry that caught her eye. His head was tilted back slightly as he guzzled the water making his Adam’s apple bob up and down. He must have poured some of the water over his head, because the front of his hair was wet and his neck was glistening in the sunlight. His free hand was rubbing his abs under his raised t-shirt. Iris snapped a couple of pictures of him.   
  
"Come on babe, work it." She joked as she snapped a couple more. "Own it."  
  
Barry blushed and she snapped a picture of that too because Barry could go from hot to adorkable in a flash.  
  
"It's a really beautiful spot. How did you find this place?"   
  
"I stumbled upon it on a hike my first week up here. It seems like no one bothers to come out here though. I've been here many times and have never seen another soul."   
  
The sat on one of the large, flat rocks, taking in the scenery, listening to nature's orchestra, and enjoying the mist from the waterfall cooling their skin. It was Iris that broke their silence twenty minutes later.  
  
"Barr, I know we haven't talked much about this, but I'm dying to know. What was Earth 2 Barry and Iris like?"  
  
"They were exactly like us and completely different."   
  
"Tell me."   
  
"Well for starters, that Barry completely geeked out when he met Harry. I mean, it really didn't faze him that I was there, which had to be weird, it was weird for me. But he was just so excited about meeting Harry."  
  
"Like you were when we went to see the particle accelerator presentation?"   
  
"I wasn't as bad as him."  
  
Iris looked a little skeptical.   
  
"Seems like you're both really passionate about the things that matter to you. I love that about you, Barr. That, and your big heart. And Iris?"  
  
"She's just like you: tough, strong and…”  
"You think I'm strong?" she interrupted.  
  
He turned to look at her, surprised she was even asking.   
  
"You're the strongest person I know, Iris. So brave. Always have been."  
  
Her face was still, making him continue.  
  
"Do you remember the first time we took down Girder? You didn't run away. You could've, but you didn't. You ended him with that punch. Remember that?" Barry smiled but then his eyes darkened.  
  
"And the time you met Reverse Flash. God, that scared me shitless. I could see him standing in front of you on that bridge and him raising his vibrating hand, but you didn't even try to run. Instead, you were trying to talk him down." Barry rubbed his face, horrified at the memory. "I couldn't get to you fast enough."  
  
"We've been through some scary stuff Barr," she said looking into the distance. She felt his hand on her chin, gently turning her face to look at him.  
  
"I love that you're strong, Iris. But I also need you to be OK with leaning on me when you need to." His face was serious. She knew he was referring to last fall and her suffering alone over the news about Wally. "No matter how busy or crazy things get, I am here for you, OK?" he told her, earnestly.  
  
She nodded. "OK."   
  
She intertwined her fingers with his and he raised her hand to his lips and kissed it.   
  
"Did it freak you out at all to see our doppelgängers married?" she asked.   
  
"Truth be told, seeing their home was trippy and I was...envious... yeah I'll admit to being envious at seeing how into him she was... but seeing them together reassured me."  
  
Iris was so struck by the words "how into him she was" that she almost didn't hear the last part.   
  
"They reassured you?" she asked.   
  
"The Barry and Iris of Earth 2 are two people who love and support each other unconditionally. Their love is real. It's indisputable. And seeing them together reminded me that our love is real too. I just needed you to get here on your own terms, in your own time."  
  
She squeezed his hand.   
  
"And then you went out with that guy from your job. What's his name..."  
  
"You know his name, Barry. And for the record, I canceled that date."   
  
"Wait. You canceled the red dress date?"   
  
Iris chuckled at his description. “Yes, Barr, I did."   
  
She ran her thumb across the scruff along his jaw line and leaned over and kissed him.   
  
"Are you making this a thing?"  
  
"Naw, just ran out of razors. Remind me to get some when we go into town."   
  
He looked at his watch. "We should head back if we're going to catch the flea market."   
  
They made the hike back to the cabin and grabbed a blanket and their jackets before driving into town. When they got there, they split up. Barry went to the concession stand to purchase their picnic and then staked out a spot on the lawn for the movie. Iris made a quick loop through the flea market. She wasn't that interested in shopping but she did find a cool silver bracelet with an amber stone for her and a Star Wars lightsaber cutlery set for Barry. She was about to head back to the park when she saw the sign: The Indulgent Shave.   
  
Remembering that Barry needed razors, Iris wandered over. However, this booth wasn't just selling shaving cream and razors. The booth was run by two well-dressed, elegant saleswomen. A third was beginning a demonstration about how to give a man the perfect shave. Iris immediately fell in love with the idea and watched the demonstration closely. It wasn't just a shave; it was a 20-minute luxurious ritual. When it was over Iris purchased a starter kit and then watched the demonstration a second time.   
  
Back at the park, Iris made her way through the tangle of outstretched legs, picnic blankets and sleeping bags to find Barry dead center, near the front. She was pretty sure she saw him give a side eye to the guy that dared to step on the edge of their blanket.   
  
"This is a good spot, front and center," she said as she plopped down next to him.  
  
"I'm so glad you're here. I don't know how many times I can tell them no."  
  
"Tell who 'no'?" Iris frowned.  
  
Barry nodded to his right and Iris looked over to see two college-aged girls staring at them. Well actually, staring at him.  
  
"What did they ask you?"  
  
"Whether I wanted to join them, if I was thirsty, or hungry, if I needed them to rub sunscreen on me, if I'd rub sunscreen on them..."   
  
"What did you say to that last one?"   
  
"I got that older lady over there to help them out." He seemed more irritated than anything. Iris laughed. He really didn't know how cute he was.   
  
"Well, they have good taste in men. I got these for you." She reached in her bag and pulled out the cutlery set.   
  
"Awesome!" followed by lightsaber noises. "Thank you! What else did you get?"  
  
"This awesome bracelet! I fell in love with it the moment I saw it." She carefully unfolded the blue tissue paper revealing her new treasure. "What do you think?"  
  
Barry leaned in to get a closer look and frowned. "It's nice...but don't you already have something like that?"  
  
"Nope, this is my first amber piece. They say amber is calming and energizing at the same time." She slipped the bracelet on her arm, admiring the stone and the unique silver setting.  
  
"I'm pretty sure you already own something with a similar design."  
  
"Barry, no, I don't. Besides, the guy said he only makes one-of-a-kind pieces. He said he made this bracelet and a pair of earrings with this design and that's it. He had already sold the earrings though."  
  
"Earrings then. That's what I'm remembering. You already have earrings like this, with this design."  
  
Iris looked away and took a deep breath. She didn't know what had gotten into him, but he clearly wasn't listening. And since when did he have a mental inventory of her jewelry collection? So weird. Maybe he had been sitting in the sun too long.   
  
She turned back to see him grinning at her and she followed his eyes to her lap where she saw another square of blue tissue paper. She looked up at him.   
  
"Well, open it."  
  
She opened the tissue paper to reveal a pair of silver earrings with amber stones; the matching pair.  
  
"I meant to give them to you last night at dinner, but I left them in my jacket pocket and forgot about them until now."  
  
She slipped them on and then leaned over and kissed him. "Thank you, Barr. I love them."  
  
He smiled and nodded. "Let's eat." They unpacked the sandwiches, potato salad, brownies and lemonade and dug in. An hour later the movie started but she didn't give her full attention to any of it. Sitting between his legs, with her back against his chest, she was distracted by his warmth, his rapid heartbeat, his fingers lightly brushing her arm, the occasional brush of his lips on her neck. She could sit like this forever.

  
  
***

  
  
Iris bent over and eased into the downward facing dog pose. She needed this yoga stretch to smooth out the leg muscles that were still tight from the hike the day before. The morning sunlight was really bright in the backyard. Although it was already hotter than the previous day, the sun felt good against her skin. Waking up next to Barry had felt even better. She would have stayed there all morning, with his arm draped over her waist, if she didn't have to pee so bad. It took her a good minute to ease out of bed without waking him. She wanted him to get his rest.  
  
Iris smiled thinking about the night before. After the movie ended there was a dance party on the lawn. The DJ was pretty decent. He looked like some college kid home for the summer who would probably leave this small town and head to Los Angeles or New York after he graduated. For the most part Iris danced and Barry watched. Even though she had given him countless dance lessons while growing up, he still always said he wasn't good on his feet. She knew he danced just fine if he relaxed and didn't think too much about it; as long as he wasn't in his head. But she didn't bother him about dancing until XO came on. Then he had to dance with her because it was one of her favorite songs.  
  
She pulled Barry to his feet and he only mildly protested before taking her in his arms and swaying to the seductive beat. They were in sync, their hips moving together, and it felt good. They danced to a few more songs and then the DJ played a couple of ballads. With her head against his chest and Barry's hands circling the bare skin of the small of her back, Iris was certain that night would have been their first night together. But then Barry didn't really make a move and she fell asleep on the ride back to the cabin. In her defense it was 2 am when they left the park and car motion did have that effect on her. All she remembered was being in a sleepy haze, Barry taking off her chucks, covering her with the quilt and pressing his lips to her forehead. She felt him pull away and she reached out and pulled him back in the bed beside her and drifted back to sleep.   
  
Iris moved through six more poses before showering and getting dressed. She cut her workout a little short because of the heat. She was in the kitchen about to put on a pot of coffee when Barry made an appearance, stretching, rubbing his eyes.   
  
"Morning. It is still morning, right?"  
  
"Morning, Barr. Yes, it's just after ten. Coffee?" she asked.   
  
He nodded, sleep still in his eyes, and headed for the bathroom. Thirty minutes later they were sitting across from each other enjoying coffee and pancakes.  
  
"OK, what's on the schedule today?" Iris asked excitedly.  
  
Barry shrugged. "It's up to you. We could just hang out here, if you want. We don't have to do anything."  
  
Iris could tell he was holding back, trying to seem nonchalant, but she was pretty sure he had her whole visit planned.   
  
"Out with it, Barr."  
  
"I signed us up for Canvass and Corkscrews at 3 pm."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"It's sort of like a painting class during happy hour. An artist walks us through the steps. Today's painting is for couples, so we'll paint different parts of the same scene."   
  
He pulled out his phone and showed her a screen shot of two paintings depicting the Eiffel Tower and the Paris skyline.  
  
"They'll show us how to paint this in a few of hours?"   
  
Barry nodded.  
  
"I'm definitely in! Anything else?"  
  
"I thought we could go bowling at this historic bowling alley in the next town over. It opened in the 1930s and has its original wooden lanes. There are no electronic scoreboards, we'll score by hand and the pins are reset manually. There's also a classic jukebox. Because it's Sunday, the earliest reservation that I could get is at 8."   
  
She could tell by the tone of his voice he was still being cautious, in case she thought it was a dumb idea.  
  
"What do you think?" he asked.  
  
"I'm thinking of that line from Pretty Woman. You know, when Richard Gere's character takes Julia Robert's character to the opera?"  
  
"When she says, 'I almost peed my pants'?"  
  
Iris laughed. "I meant the line, 'In case I forget to tell you later, I had a really good time tonight.'"  
  
Barry smiled and Iris ran her fingers over his growing scruff.   
  
"I forgot to get razors again," he said.  
  
"I'll shave it for you," she offered.  
  
"You don't mean with the razor you shave your legs with, do you?"  
  
"No, it'll be a treat. Yeah?"  
  
He looked a little apprehensive. "I heal fast...Ok."  
  
"You're going to love it!"  
  
They cleaned up their breakfast dishes and Barry watched as Iris prepped everything. She asked him to find a couple of hand towels and when he returned with them she wet them and put one in the microwave and the other in the freezer. She went into the bedroom and came out with a bag and nodded for Barry to join her in the bathroom. He put the lid down and sat on the toilet and watched her as she set up three small bottles, a shaving brush, a small bowl and a razor on the sink.  
  
"Where'd you get all of this?" he asked surprised.  
  
"At the flea market."  
  
She poured the shaving cream into the small bowl, added a bit of warm water and whipped it in a circular motion, creating a lather. She looked up just in time to see his eyes travel down the length of her body, his tongue tracing his bottom lip.   
  
She stepped in front of him and ran her fingers through his hair and then lightly traced one of his eyebrows.   
  
He looked up at her. "You're not thinking of shaving them or plucking them or anything are you?"  
  
"No, I just really like them. Ready?"  
  
"Ready."  
  
"Close your eyes." She inched closer, close enough to touch, but not touching. She studied him. His face was a little tense. "Relax," she whispered and leaned down and kissed him softly on the lips.   
  
She turned on the sink and ran a wash cloth under warm water and wet his face. She put a dollop of the foaming cleanser in her hand, and tilted his head back. She kissed a freckle on the side of his neck, then another one, and one more.   
  
She looked up and he was looking at her, his eyes dark and intense.  
  
"Close your eyes," she said softly.  
  
She tilted his head back again and worked the cleanser it into his face and neck, creating a nice lather. She rinsed the cleanser off with the washcloth and then massaged a few drops of the pre-shave oil into his beard area. She tried to emulate the technique of the saleswoman at the flea market; massaging the oil into his skin using a downward and outward movement and then up and out on the sides. The tension disappeared from his face. As she continued working, she felt Barry's hands on her hips, his thumbs moving up and down, mirroring the rhythm of her movements.  
  
Reluctantly she moved from him. "Don't move. Be right back," she said.  
  
She went to the kitchen and removed the heated towel from the microwave, testing it on her inner arm to make sure it wasn't too hot. She returned to the bathroom and nudged one of her legs between his so that she could get closer. Barry was still, his eyes were still closed.  
  
"This towel is hot," she warned before draping it along the base of his neck, laying it against his jawline and then doubling it over the mustache area just as the saleswoman did. Barry groaned.  
  
"Is it too, hot?"  
  
"No."  
  
She brought the ends of the towel up and around his forehead, covering his entire face except his nose. She pressed down on the hot cloth, molding it to his face, transferring the heat to his skin. She felt Barry's hand on the back of her thigh, just under the hem of her hoodie dress, his fingers circling lightly.   
  
"This has to sit for a minute or two," she said. Barry was completely still, except for the hand still circling her thigh. The touch was light but constant and Iris had the urge to squeeze her thighs together but she couldn't because Barry's leg was between hers.  
  
She removed the towel from Barry's face, reached for the small bowl and used the brush to apply the shaving cream to his face and neck in quick circular movements.  
She then traded the brush and bowl for the razor.   
  
Iris worked meticulously, gliding the razor down, cheek to chin, first one side of his face and then the other, running the razor under water between strokes. She needed to get lower to get the area under his chin so she nudged his legs closed with her knee, straddled him, and sat on his thighs. Barry gulped hard, but his hands pulled her closer. She was extra careful working under his chin, making sure not to nick the skin. She tilted his head to the left and right, inspecting her work. Satisfied, she got up and went back to the kitchen to retrieve the cold towel from the freezer.    
  
She sat on him again. "This will be cold," she warned before laying the cold cloth on his face. Barry sighed. She used the cloth to remove all traces of shaving cream. She reached for the after-shave soothing balm and smoothed it into face and neck and then worked her way up to massage his temples for good measure.  
  
Iris slid the back of her hand over Barry's cheek admiring her work.   
  
"All done!" she announced.  
  
Without opening his eyes, Barry leaned down and kissed her, slowly, sensuously and for the first time his tongue was circling hers, light and teasing. When their lips parted, he smiled at her.   
  
"Well, what do you think?" she asked him excitedly.  
  
"You're a really good kisser..."  
  
She giggled. "I meant the shave! Take a look."  
  
She got up and led Barry to the sink so he could look in the mirror. Barry surveyed himself, running his fingers over cheeks and neck.   
  
"It's really a close shave. Best shave I've ever had! Thank you for doing this. I enjoyed it."  
  
"And I didn't nick you once! I have to admit I was a little nervous about that. Beginners luck maybe? I did watch that demonstration twice yesterday."  
  
"So that's why you were gone so long?"  
  
"Yeah. I wanted it to be a surprise. Who knew there were so many steps, so many products! And it's harder not having a barber chair. Having to sit on your lap to get close is not the ideal way to do it."  
  
"Actually, yes. Yes it is."   
  
She bumped him with her hip. "I want to work up to a straight razor. That's supposed to give the closest shave of all."   
  
She packed up the products and left the bathroom with him following behind her.  
  
"So...when can I do you?" Barry asked.  
  
Iris stopped in her tracks and turned around to look at him.   
  
"Oh, I didn't mean do you, do you..."  
  
Iris raised an eyebrow.  
  
I'm not saying I want to do you..."  
  
Iris tilted her head, silently questioning him.  
  
"I mean, of course, I want to do...I want us to..."  
  
Iris waited, not letting him off the hook.   
  
"You know I can just run back in time and erase these last two minutes."  
  
She laughed and continued on to the kitchen.   
  
"What I meant was, when can I do something similar for you?" he asked earnestly.  
  
"Did you have something in mind?"  
  
"I could wrap your hair tonight. I'm pretty sure I remember how."  
  
"Really?"  
  
Barry nodded confidently. Junior year in high school he had wrapped her hair almost every night for two weeks after she sprained her wrist rollerblading.  
  
"But you've tucked me in two nights in a row and..."  
  
"I couldn't find those clips...pins. Or your scarf. I didn't want to go through your bag..."  
  
The fact that he even thought about protecting her hair touched her.   
  
"OK...looking forward to checking out your skills."  
  
By 12:30 pm the cabin was so hot that they decided to go for a long drive and then had a late lunch in town before heading to Canvass and Corkscrews. Their paintings turned out really great if you looked at them from afar. Up close, Barry and Iris couldn't stop laughing at their "masterpieces." They had a blast bowling with Iris winning three games and Barry winning two. She was laughing at Barry's victory dance after the last game when they overheard the quick exchange.   
  
"Can we play one more game, dad?"  
"That's enough for tonight, Slugger, it's past your bedtime."  
  
It was like the air was sucked out of the bowling alley. Iris could see the joy leave Barry's face. On the ride back to the cabin he was quiet, solemn, and Iris made sure she didn't fall asleep even if he didn't want to talk.  
  
It was much hotter this night than the previous two. It had hardly cooled down at all after sunset and the heat in the cabin was unbearable. Barry had disappeared into the backyard minutes after they returned and Iris gave him a little space, hanging out by the tree in the front yard to get a connection; checking messages, texts, and twitter. Her article went live on the CCPN website at midnight and she was happy to see it already had a number of hits, comments and shares. She responded to some of the questions in the comments section and on twitter. It was almost 1 am when she went to check on Barry. She crawled into the hammock next to him and waited.  
  
"I'm sorry," he whispered.  
  
"Why are you sorry, Barr?"  
  
"Because I feel I shouldn't be this affected just because I overhead a father talking to his son."  
  
"Why don't you think you should be affected?"  
  
"Because I thought I had moved past it and now I feel like I've been hit with a ton of bricks."  
  
"Barr, you're expecting a lot of yourself. It's only been a few weeks since you lost your dad. It takes a lot longer than that to heal."  
  
"I just feel like an emotional yo-yo."  
  
"I think that's a perfect analogy." She took his hand. "You're going to have good days and bad days. You're going to have happy moments, sad moments and angry moments. They're all deserved, Barr. Give yourself permission to feel them all."  
  
Neither of them spoke for a very long time and then Barry whispered, "I love you."  
  
"I know." was her reply.  
  
"Wait. Are you quoting Han Solo in Empire to me?"  
  
"Ask me again sometime."  
  
"What...? Now you're quoting Luke in Jedi?"  
  
"Anything to make you smile, Barr.  Anything to make you smile."

  
  
 ***

  
  
"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty. We got some reading to do!"  
  
Iris struggled to open her eyes. She felt like she had just fallen asleep. "What? What time is it?"  
  
"It's 8:00 am."  
  
"It's my day off, Barr. Why are you waking me up so early?" She attempted to pull the quilt over her head. She couldn't believe she had let him sleep late all weekend and here he was waking her up.  
  
"I couldn't wait any longer." He held out a steaming cup. "Coffee?"  
  
Realizing that trying to get back to sleep would be a losing battle, Iris pushed herself up in bed and took the cup of hot liquid from his hand. On the first sip she realized that it wasn't the homemade coffee that they had been making do with, but an Americano with an extra shot from Jitters, just the way she liked it. She relished another sip before asking, "You couldn't wait for what?"  
  
"To read your article. Actually, I want you to read it to me."   
  
He handed her a cronut before turning to get the stack of newspapers he'd left by the door. He kicked off his chucks and sat on the bed beside her.   
  
Iris eyed the stack of newspapers. "Barry, how many CCPN newspapers did you buy?"   
  
"Just one."  
  
"So what's all that?" She pointed to the stack.  
  
"I thought you'd want to see them all, well at least the major ones. I only got the major ones."  
  
Barry plopped the Washington Post in her lap. And then the NY Times, the LA Times, the Miami Sun Times, the Rocky Mountain News...and on it went. Iris was confused and then her eyes widened as she figured it all out.  
  
He nodded, grinning. "Congrats on getting picked up by the AP! Your article is in all of them!" He hugged her. "I'm so proud of you!"  
  
"Oh my gosh! I can't believe it!" She rummaged through the pile of papers and pulled out the NY Times. She found the beginning of her article on the front page, under the fold. Barry had her read it to him. When she finished she didn't know which of them was grinning more.   
  
She spent the morning checking phone messages and answering email and comments posted to her article on CCPN's website. She was amazed by how much traction the story was getting. This was not only great exposure for herself but also for CCPN. Three hours later she was caught up with all of the messages for the time being. After she finally got dressed she found Barry sitting in the front yard. He jumped up when he saw her.   
  
"Twitter is going crazy over your article, Iris! College kids across the country are talking about it! There's even a hashtag now: #CheckUrStudentLoan. It started trending 20 minutes ago."  
  
"I knew it was an important story, but I didn't expect all this!"  
  
"It's so cool, Iris. A lot of people are going to make different choices, better choices because of you."  
  
"I couldn't ask for anything more. So what's on the schedule today?" she asked him. "I'm done with work until I return to the office on Wednesday. The interns will handle a lot of the follow-up until I get back."  
  
"Well the original plan was to go to the county fair today. It should be much less crowded since it's Monday."  
  
"Games, rides and cotton candy? I'm here for it."  
  
"Then I thought we could go out to dinner to celebrate, but the two nice restaurants in town are closed on Mondays. So...I can cook?"  
  
"Sounds like a plan!"

  
  
***

  
  
Iris enjoyed the warm pulsing water as it hit her shoulders and back, rinsing the stickiness of a hot and humid day off her skin. She reminisced about playing mini golf and skee ball and riding bumper cars at the county fair. She and Barry had had so much fun and she had two new teddy bears from their efforts. She smiled remembering Barry's face when he handed her the second bear, the one he had won for her. He seemed so proud. She had them take a selfie and made it her lock screen right then and there.  
  
Iris turned the water off, stepped out of the shower and toweled off, still thinking. The last three days had brought them even closer, if that were at all possible. Emotionally, she had never felt closer to Barry, but she was starting to wonder about the physical part of their relationship. She was waiting for Barry to make a move and so far he really hadn't. He seemed to be taking his time, which was incredibly sweet, but she wanted more than "sweet.” She wanted him and the sexual tension was maddening.

  
Iris wrapped herself in her robe and padded back to the bedroom. She could hear Barry banging around in the kitchen, starting dinner. How could she not desire the man who loved and supported her, who said and did the most romantic things, who wrote the most beautiful letters, and who was strong and solid and warm when she rested her head against him. How could she not want a guy who cheered her on when she played the balloon dart game and won the first teddy bear, but was still happy to win one for her, too? How could she not want a man who ran around from city to city just so she would have hard copies of the newspapers that had published her article? And now he was in the kitchen making dinner again.   
  
Iris rubbed Almond Cookie body butter into her moist skin. She thought about the Ferris wheel earlier that day. Barry had guided her by the waist as they got into the cab and before he could sit back in the seat next to her she had reached up and kissed him sweetly on the lips. Their lips parted briefly before he pulled her back to him and kissed her again. This time the heat between them was palpable; Barry didn't hold back at all. He cradled her head in his hands, his thumb rubbing back and forth across her cheek as his tongue swirled sensuously with hers. Her stomach flipped and she was a little lightheaded; unsure if it was due to the motion of the Ferris wheel, Barry or both. Their lips didn't part until they felt the cab hit the platform and come to a stop. Barry gave her one last peck before they exited the cab and the teen in charge of manning the ride derisively told them to "get a room."  
  
They walked around the fair hand in hand for a while, not saying anything. She slyly looked up at him, and was impressed with the self-assured look on his face, the squareness of his jaw, and the slight lift of his chest. That kiss really surprised her. Until the Ferris wheel, all of their kisses had been sweet and tender, which she loved. But, this one was passionate and intense and hot. Really hot! She had never felt a kiss like that before and all she wanted was more. But before she knew it they were back to their goofy and giddy selves playing foosball, trying to out-do each other. On the ride back to cabin they talked and laughed like they always did and Iris wondered when she'd see Ferris Wheel Barry again.  
  
Iris walked over to her travel bag and pulled out two pairs of sexy underwear. She frowned, thinking about how she had gone shopping the day before driving up to the cabin and bought several pairs of new undies just for Barry's eyes and how he had yet to see any of them. She held a pair of blue lace panties and a black thong between her fingers trying to decide between the two. Maybe she should give him a little show, she thought. Maybe she should walk into the kitchen right now and let her robe slip open a little bit. She was smiling to herself when she heard Barry at the door.  
  
"Iris, did you hear me?" he asked.  
  
She hadn't heard him, but she got an idea as she made her way across the room and opened the door.  
  
"Sorry, what did you say?"  
  
"Do you want shrimp stir fry or chicken?"  
  
"Shrimp," she answered. He nodded and was about to head back to the kitchen when she stopped him.  
  
"Barry, do you think I should wear these tonight?" She held up the blue lace. "Or these...?" She held up the thong. Barry looked down at the underwear, paused and frowned a little.  
  
"Whichever you like," he finally answered.  
  
His indifference hurt her feelings a little and Iris quickly turned around and headed back across the room.  
  
"OK," she said.  
  
She was disappointed that her little seduction attempt was a fail. She was digging in her bag again when she felt him behind to her. He bent down and whispered in her ear.  
  
"I like them both, I really do, but whichever you choose won't be on for long tonight. I promise." His voice was low, sexy.  
  
And before she could even look up, he was gone.  
  
Iris was a bit stunned. She could feel the heat rising within her. Did she hear him correctly? Did Barry just say what she thought he said? In that voice? She sat on the bed trying to compose herself.  She was excited, giddy even, and a bundle of nervous energy.  
  
She got up and rummaged to the bottom of her bag and pulled out the small pink box from the lingerie store, Agent Provocateur. She unfolded the layers of tissue paper revealing the pair of blush pink silk panties with black trim. This pair had cost a lot more than the others because it had a custom embroidered message on the back. She didn't normally shop at this store, but Linda had given her a gift certificate for her birthday. Iris slipped them on and added a delicate gold belly chain around her small waist. She went to the closet and removed the pale pink halter sundress. The color, fabric and backless design made it angelic and flirty in the front, but pure temptress in the back. She slipped the dress on and noticed the close fit across her butt. It was perfect. Iris swooped her hair into messy side ponytail and turned in the mirror appreciating the overall effect.  
  
When she approached the kitchen, Iris could hear Barry softly singing "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz. It was probably his favorite song when they were in college.  
  
"What can I help with?" she asked him.   
  
Barry stopped chopping veggies and spun around. A smile of appreciation took over his face as he took her in. He had on a blue button down shirt which made his green eyes seem more intense.  
  
"You look beautiful, really beautiful...and you can set the table. I just brought everything in from outside because it rained when you were in the shower. It's stopped for now but we should probably stay inside tonight; just in case."  
  
"OK," she answered. She grabbed the dinner plates and started across the room towards the dining table making sure Barry got the full view of her backless dress.   
"But I'm not afraid of getting a little wet." She gave Barry a sly smile over her shoulder as she passed him and began setting the table.   
  
Out of the corner of her eye she could see Barry eyeing her, see him lose focus and knock over the bowl of stir fry veggies and the plate of shrimp. Only his super-speed saved their dinner from hitting the floor.  
  
They made dinner together, moving around the kitchen in sync. But it was different than all the times they had cooked together before. Every chance Barry got, his hand was on the small of her back guiding her to the left of him or to the right or (she suspected) just to touch her because she certainly was not in his way. And then she made every attempt to actually be in his way and she marveled at how easily his hands found her waist, the small of her back, or her shoulders to gently move past her; his warm hands lingering on her skin just a beat longer than necessary. The sexual tension between them was unmistakable and after Barry threw the veggies in the wok, he suddenly spun Iris around, pinned her against the counter and kissed her deeply and passionately just like he had on the Ferris wheel. Iris wondered where in the world he learned to kiss like that. And once again she was flustered and shy and excited all at the same time.  
  
After they ate, they went outside and sat on the patio steps, taking in the stillness of the night. The clouds had cleared, revealing an almost full moon and twinkling stars against the dark sky. It had cooled off considerably and there was a gentle breeze.  
  
"This sky reminds me of our senior class trip to Top Point Ranch." Barry said.  
  
"Yeah, it does!" Iris agreed. "The stars were so bright there, and seemed so close, just like this."  
  
"And everybody hooked up with somebody," Barry remembered.  
  
"And we just hung out, just the two of us, talking and laughing, under the stars." Iris smiled at the memory.  
  
"Everybody else thought we hooked up though."   
  
"Yeah, I know." Iris smiled mischievously remembering. "You should've made a move..."  
  
Barry raised an eyebrow, a hint of confusion in his face. He shifted his body to face her.   
  
"Are you saying you considered hooking up with me way back then?"  
  
"Some things may have crossed my mind when we were in high school...and in college," she admitted with a flirtatious smile.   
  
"Really?" He looked skeptical, like he was trying to figure out if she was playing with him.  
  
Iris' face turned serious as she gauged Barry's reaction. She had an inkling that deep down Barry hadn't yet allowed himself to believe she desired him. She remembered his comment at the waterfall about being envious of how much E2 Iris wanted E2 Barry.   
  
"Barry, do you remember sophomore year in college, the year our spring breaks were different? I came to visit you for a few days even though you still had classes?"  
  
Barry nodded. That was his first year as an RA. He had a single and Iris stayed with him.  
  
Iris continued. "We had so much fun that weekend. I slept on that old futon the first two nights, but the third night, my last night, I had a little surprise planned for when you got back from the lab. I thought it was going to be a special night for us, a really special night..."  
  
Barry rested his head in his hands. He definitely remembered that night. He got stuck in the lab a lot longer than he had anticipated and didn't get back to the dorm until after midnight. He remembered slipping quietly into the room just in case she was already asleep. His desk lamp was still on, but turned toward the wall casting the room in subdued light. His Jason Mraz CD was playing softly. He noticed immediately that the futon was still folded up and his first thought was that Iris was upstairs on the girls' floor hanging out. He scanned his desk to see if she had left him a note. Even though the room wasn't very big, it took him a couple of moments to realize that Iris was actually in his bed, asleep.   
  
To this day, he had a crystal clear image of her lying there, on her side, facing the wall, her natural curls covering his pillow and much of her face. She had on his favorite Star Wars t-shirt which ordinarily would have downed her, but she had it tied up just above her waist. And the only other thing she had on was a pair of navy blue lace panties. He stood there admiring her for quite some time, all of him at attention. And then he wasn't 100% sure what it meant. Or what to do next.  
  
The skeptical part of him came up with tons of plausible explanations. Like she couldn't sleep on that old futon one more night because it was too uncomfortable. Or she was wearing his t-shirt because she didn't pack enough pajamas. And she wasn't under the covers because the room was too warm. The list went on and on. All he wanted to do was to kiss her awake and make love to her. But he wasn't sure that's what she wanted and he'd never live it down if he got into bed with her and he was wrong. He decided he could "accidentally" wake her and was searching for his heaviest textbook to drop "accidentally" when he heard the commotion down the hall. As the RA he knew he had to check it out.  
  
Several hours later, Barry was still in the ER waiting room when he got Iris' text that she was taking an earlier train back home. He had never been so annoyed with anyone than he was with the two freshmen who stupidly decided to try skateboarding down a flight of stairs. One had a broken leg; the other had a fractured wrist. He didn't want Iris to leave campus without seeing her but he had no idea how long he would be at the hospital. Only the freshman with the fracture had been discharged. So he apologized for not being there to see her off and told her to text him when she got home.   
  
When she did text, she waited for him to say something, anything, about the previous night. She knew he had seen her, half naked, in his bed. She saw his backpack on his desk when she woke up at 3 am. But his texts were rambles about freshmen antics, broken limbs and an over-crowded waiting room. For his part, Barry had spent the morning trying to compose a flirty text without coming on too strong. It took him a while, but he finally came up with: "Navy blue is my new favorite color." But before he could hit 'send' he got a text from her: "Had to borrow a t-shirt. Way too hot last night. Must be coming down with something." Over the years, neither one of them brought up what didn't happen that night again.  
  
"So yeah, Barry," she gave him a shy smile, "that's one time back then that I thought about..." Her voice trailed off.  
  
"So...you weren't wearing my t-shirt because you were hot?"  
  
"Barry, no."  
  
Barry shook his head finally understanding completely.  
  
"Whatever happened to that t-shirt by the way? I loved that shirt!"   
  
Although it was his absolute favorite, he had never asked for it back. He used to secretly hope she wore it from time to time.  
  
"I know it was your favorite, Barr, that's why I chose to wear it that night."  
  
He was watching her intently and she looked away.  
  
"When you were in that coma, I slept in it every night."  
  
She hadn't planned to tell him that last part, but the words were out before she could stop them.  
Even with his face partly shielded by the darkness of the night, Iris could see his stunned expression. He responded by pulling her into his lap and he whispered in her ear: "I love you, Iris West. Forever and always."  
  
He kissed her, a deep, slow and sensuous kiss. Iris could taste the cotton candy he had after dinner, a leftover from the fair. He finished the kiss with a soft tug on her bottom lip which ignited a fire within her.  
  
He undid her ponytail and ran his fingers through her hair as his kiss grew urgent. She felt him harden beneath her thigh and the fingers in her hair froze. She looked at him and could see the hesitation in his face. She shifted so that the fullness of her behind was against his hardness and she pressed herself to him.  
  
That move was enough to embolden him and Ferris Wheel Barry, the Barry that had pressed her against the kitchen counter, re-emerged. He pulled her closer, and worked his way up her neck alternating between moist kisses and light bites of her tender skin. And then his mouth found hers again.   
  
"You're really good at this," she whispered and he lifted her like she was light as a feather and led her to her bedroom.  
Barry backed himself into the dark, moon-lit room pulling Iris to him. He moved behind her, pulled her hair to one side, and placed moist kisses down the nape of her neck and along her bare shoulder. Iris hummed her approval.   
  
Barry undid the tie at the back of her neck, and gently slid his fingertips all the way down the center of her back and back up again. She shivered, marveling at the slowness and deliberateness of his movements, like he savored every moment.   
  
"You're so soft," he murmured in her ear as his hands peeled the pale pink fabric from her skin and let it fall to her waist. He cupped her breasts in his hands and ran his thumbs back and forth across her nipples and Iris couldn't contain the heat rising within her.  
  
She spun around and stretched up on the tips of her toes to reach him. She crushed her lips to his, kissing him fiercely. She caught his earlobe gently between her teeth and slid down, then grazed the tender skin under his jawline. Barry groaned, a deep guttural sound that made her smile. She unbuttoned his shirt and ran her hands up and down his bare chest before pulling the shirt off and dropping it to the floor.  
  
Barry sat down on the bed and pulled Iris between his legs. His mouth captured a breast and his tongue toyed with the hardness of her nipple. Iris arched her back and her breathing quickened. His hands roamed her body until he found the zipper and slowly unzipped her dress at the waist.   
  
He pulled back from her to allow his eyes to roam lazily over her body as the dress slid to the floor. He marveled at the sight of her, the curve of her shoulders peeking out beneath her dark curls, her breasts, one of them glistening from the wetness of his mouth, the smoothness of her skin. Enchanted, his fingers traced the delicate gold chain around her waist, but he looked up at her with a quizzical expression.  
  
"Now these are not either of the options that you showed me earlier," his said, his eyes playfully accusing.   
  
"You don't like them?" she asked.  
  
He nodded. "I do." His hands made their way behind her and cupped her butt as his mouth made friends with the other breast, sucking move savagely than he had the first.  
  
Iris gasped. "These are extra special," she managed to get out.  
  
"Umm hmm," he agreed, not allowing his mouth to break contact.  
"I got them for you."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes..."   
  
She was breathy, feeling the throbbing between her legs. She wanted him to touch her there, but Barry continued massaging her ass, enjoying its fullness, as his mouth made sure that neither breast was jealous.   
  
"Just for you," she whispered.  
  
He pulled back to get another look and she turned to give him the full view. He saw the curly script and ran his fingers across the letters. It was in French.  
  
"What does it say?" he asked in a low voice.  
  
Iris turned back around, and lifted his chin to meet his eyes.  
  
"Je suis a toi." Barry raised his eyebrows, questioning.   
  
"It means, 'I'm yours.'"  
  
Barry grabbed her, wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tight, his head resting against her torso. She ran her fingers gently through his hair. A second later, in one swift move, Barry picked her up and swung her around and laid her on the bed. He pulled off his jeans and inched towards her, moving slowly up her body, kissing her legs along the way. Iris wiggled in anticipation.

  
He moved between her legs and kissed up her inner thigh, moving toward her center. He rubbed his nose against her there, lightly, slowly, back and forth, inhaling her scent. The coolness of his inhale and the heat of his exhale made Iris moan.  
  
"God, that feels good," she said. She had never been teased this way.  
  
Barry raised up and hooked his fingers on the sides of the pink silk and he looked up to meet her dark eyes as he pulled the panties off. He leaned down and whispered in her ear, "I keep my promises."  
  
Iris had never seen Barry so sexy, so confident. She pulled him down to her and devoured him. She pushed his boxer briefs down and reached for the condom she had hidden under a pillow earlier and tucked it into his hand.  
  
Barry leaned back to put the condom on and then hovered above her once again. Iris squirmed again, ready for him, but then she saw that look in his eyes. She knew he was in his head now, overthinking.   
  
She reached up and cradled his face in her hands. She kissed him softly and looked him in the eye. "I love you, Barr. Make love to me."   
  
He kissed her back, his tongue was hot against hers and then against her bottom lip, tracing it back and forth. He slid into her slowly, gently and Iris gasped at the connection, her fingernails digging into his shoulder. Barry began slow, measured strokes, cautious.   
  
"Is this OK?" he asked her.  
  
"Yes...you feel so good."  
  
Iris bit her lip relishing in the fullness, the warmth, the weight of him. She squeezed him, an inside hug, and Barry's head dropped to her neck. "Iris..." she heard him whisper, in a low, deep voice. She reached down and grabbed his butt, pulling him even closer. "God, Iris..." she heard again. He nibbled her shoulder, her neck and tangled his tongue with hers. He lifted up, shifted his body slightly forward and rocked his pelvis against hers; not too slow, not too fast. She brought her hips up to meet him and they were gloriously in sync. His hands were in her hair, smoothing it from front to back and Iris felt herself getting lost in the all pleasurable sensations. She heard the bed squeaking beneath them and the sound turned her on even more; evidence they were really doing this.   
  
"Oh, Barr..." She called out to him, feeling herself getting close, really close as she dug her nails into his back. Barry stayed the course, keeping the same rhythm, which drove Iris insane.  She heard Barry mumble something. And then she was there, those few seconds right before the release when everything feels too good to be true. She heard the moans. Hers. His. She tightened her body around him and the pleasure waves took over her body.  
  
Iris felt Barry slip from her and the heat of his body was gone for a minute before he returned. She felt like she was floating. Her heart was still racing and her chest rose and fell at a rapid rate. She felt a light kiss on her shoulder. She opened her eyes to see Barry smiling at her.  
  
"That was awesome, Barr."   
  
"Really awesome," he replied. He kissed her lightly on the lips and then he was smiling again which made her smile, too.  
  
"You're really beautiful when you come." She blushed and brought her hand to her face. He moved her hand away and kissed her again. "Really beautiful."  
  
Iris snuggled against him, her head on his chest. His fingers played in her hair.   
  
"Barr.."

His eyes were closed. "Hmm?"

  
"Did you say something to me near the end there?"

  
"I did."

  
"What did you say?"

  
"Please be close." 

  
She laughed and then he laughed and they dozed off to sleep.  


*** 

  
Iris was curled up in the window seat in the living area, cradling a steamy cup of coffee, looking out the window, reminiscing about the previous night. She had awakened him with kisses about an hour after they had dozed off needing to be with him again. She had gotten on top this time, in control, and it was the first time she saw his orgasm face and it made her smile just thinking about it.   
  
Around 1 am she had gotten up to wrap her hair when she felt him behind her trailing kisses down her back. He remembered the steps just like he said he did and wrapped it for her. Then he picked her up and had her against the wall and it was quick and delicious. Then there was the sunrise sex. That's how she would refer to it from that moment on. Sunlight had forced itself through the window and smacked her in the face. She got up to go to the bathroom. When she returned, he was awake, and he had that look. They had started slow, lots of touching, lots of laughter. And then he asked her if she wanted to try something different. For a split second she wondered if she had a sex freak on her hands; especially when he asked her to trust him. She trusted him and followed his instructions and it was the hardest thing she ever did sexually. He didn't allow her to brace herself in any way. No holding on to the headboard or squeezing a pillow. She couldn’t clench her hands or teeth or bite her lip. She couldn't hold on to him, or grasp him or squeeze him. Nothing. As Barry kissed her and caressed her and made love to her she had to let all the sensations course through her body. It was extremely frustrating and tremendously wonderful and when she came it was the best orgasm she had ever had. She was pretty sure the distant neighbors heard her scream his name. She asked him where he learned such things and he replied that he had done his research because he was a scientist. Iris had thought he was referring to porn but he meant actual scientific studies; the benefits of loving a nerd. Iris made a mental note to do a little research herself.  
  
She was lost in thought when she felt the kiss in her hair.   
  
"Morning," Barry said. He sat across from her, a coffee mug in his hand.  
  
She looked up at him and smiled. "Morning. I didn't hear you."  
  
"I know, you seem to be thinking hard about...something." He smiled mischievously.   
  
She leaned over and kissed him. "Definitely...something."  
  
"When I was in the shower, I was thinking it'd be great if you were there."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"And that gave me an idea. We should come up with new three lists."  
  
She raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Not your kind of three-list. I'm going to pretend that doesn't exist. But a list of places we should do it."  
  
"What?"  
  
He nodded. "It'll be a working list. Once we cross one place off, we can add a new one."  
  
"And you just thought of this?"  
  
"Sort of. Of course we can veto a place if it seems too weird or something."  
  
"Something tells me you already have your list."  
  
"I do."  
  
"Let's hear it then."  
  
"OK, in no particular order, my lab."  
  
"You want to do it in your lab? Does the door even work anymore?"  
  
"Ah, I see you're thinking about logistics already. I'll mark that as a strong possible." He winked at her. "Next, the stacks at HU's library."  
  
"In public? A really quiet, public place?"  
  
"Well that has been a fantasy of mine since undergrad. I didn't know you were so...um...vocal, which I absolutely love, so you'll probably get us busted, but yeah."  
  
"If we get busted, it will not be my fault."  
  
"Hmm...that also doesn't sound like a 'no.'"  
  
"The third?"  
  
"Jitters rooftop."  
  
She smiled mischievously at him.  
  
"Your turn."  
  
"Jitters rooftop, for sure!" she exclaimed.  
  
"Nope. Already on my list. Let's not short-change ourselves."  
  
"So many rules for a pretend game."  
  
"It's definitely not pretend. I'm serious."  
  
"Ok, well my absolute first choice is not a specific place per say. I want to do it in the rain."  
  
"The rain?"  
  
"Yeah, you know on those really hot summer days. You can smell the rain in the air even before it starts. And then you get caught in it and your clothes are wet and stuck against your skin. And we do it against a tree or something...but I don't have a specific place in mind, more like a specific setting."  
  
Barry leaned in closer to her, mesmerized.  
  
"Ok, the rain. Next."  
  
"It's tough because you took the rooftop."  
  
"I'll give you the rooftop and I'll add under the stars since we're also doing settings."  
  
"Just under the stars?"  
  
"Yeah. Stretch goal: on top of a Porsche."   
  
Iris had to admit this was all sounding sexy as hell.   
  
"Your third?" he asked.  
  
"In front of a mirror." His mouth fell open. "Or in an elevator. Actually, the elevators in the Baldwin towers are mirrored so we can kill two birds with one stone."  
  
"You're really getting into this..." He reached for her, but she slapped away his hands.  
  
"Nope, nope, we have a schedule to keep. We have to pack up the cabin and run errands in town before hitting the road. Dinner's at six and Wally's invited a friend so we have to be on time."  
  
She gave him a quick peck, and then a deeper kiss before getting up and heading to the kitchen.   
  
They took down the twinkle lights, packed up the outdoor furniture, cleaned up the cabin, cleaned out the fridge, and packed their things. They were on the road by early afternoon, headed back to Central City. Barry drove and Iris still wondered where all the people were because the roads were just as deserted as when she drove up. It looked like it was going to rain. As soon Iris had that thought, a big, fat drop hit the windshield. And then another. They kept driving and soon were in the middle of a steady rain. Iris stuck her hand out of her window, feeling the cool drops against her skin. She turned to look at Barry and he raised his eyebrows, a silent question. She smiled and nodded and Barry pulled off onto the side of the road...


End file.
